Friday, September 18, 2009

Being True to Yourself… Prerequisite to a Happy Life!

I am going to stir the pot on the back burner at my café. It has been said that when something is dead it floats to the top. That may be a true statement; however, I'm no expert on dead stuff. If this piece floats anything to the top, let's throw it out! I try to keep myself present with life giving recipes.

I realize that by stirring this pot it could steam up the kitchen, but that's what it's all about here at The Writer's Café. The goal will be, to create a little steaminess and then when it clears, we’ll see what the fallout will bring. When we're always going with the same old recipes, it can make for a pretty boring existence. Some people can get very nervous at trying new things. However, until we are willing to try, no one will ever know what is really for them. Or, would we rather just stay in our little comfort zones of not throwing someone else off kittle?

When it comes to being true to yourself, it can be a task to separate oneself from the “group” analogy and listen to one's own personal intuitive response. Normally in our society, one does not trust their own instincts. They had indoctrinated themselves to the point of overload on what is acceptable for the group, rather than what is right for the individual. Where in all the chaos is the peace for oneself?

The questions one may ask themselves, from my experience, comes from a very unfamiliar authentic place within. What or who is steering this place is a question one may ask themselves. All of these observations and experiences of life through my lens, carry my own opinionated answers. Here at the café, you are allowed to have your own opinion without criticism.

I have listened to several conversations, whereby great souls question their own wisdom for what would serve them well. At the last minute, they will still be controlled by the “group” thought, amazing! Your own “happy life” can only come from your experiences, introspection and choices, not someone else's for you. Living in someone else's shadow will only steal your own shine. Being true to yourself can be (a)lone road towards an authentic life. What defines one's happiness may not be the same recipe for another.

Breaking free from “group” analogy does not mean that you have to sever ties; it just may mean establishing boundaries towards your own freedom. Sometimes a change of venue can be what the inner doctor orders. Your directives will come when you learn to trust yourself. Trusting yourself gives you the courage to know who to trust, with you.

Living in a world that is more than willing to advise you what to do is all the more reason to get in contact with you, the real you! If you don't know you, you will be directed by everybody else. We begin our lives by trying to fit in somewhere, so it should be no surprise when we wake up one day feeling like we don't know who we are or what we believe about anything.

The majority of our society lives on borrowed beliefs anyway; so, the road to discovery of yourself can be just as long as the road you've already traveled. I realize that this is not a comforting thought, but it can be a real one for lots of people. Believe me; I have these conversations every day with somebody. If you really open yourself to others to hear their stories, it will start to resonate within you that none of us are all that different.

I am discussing this topic because it is a recurring one across gender, race, age and religious lines. So, you thought that when people have religion, they are free of this topic? Not hardly! Probably this is the largest group, with all the self questioning of being real. To blame everything in your life that is not authentic on God is hardly an excuse. Being true to you is one of the biggest requirements in true happiness. God's business is “true happiness”!

Being a “great impersonator” is about observation, and within the eyes of the beholder. We learn as children to impersonate adults, because we want attention and acceptance. What are our excuses now? Be the originator of who you are now, because there is no one else you have to please! Living in your own skin is up to you. Just do it!

Still trying to figure out who you are? Take your time, one step at a time. Redefining oneself is all about your discoveries. This is your journey towards the person you really want to be in the world. When you look in the mirror, do you really know that person? If not, neither does anyone else! Present to the world, what you want them to remember. Live free… dance your dance… be true to yourself, what ever that means for you. Live from the place of the person you know, and allow others to know him/her also. Live your “Happy Life”!

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